Monday, November 25, 2013

We're a Pack Again!

I've been wanting to write a post on this for a while to properly announce this, but haven't really gotten around to it. If you follow my Tumblr, you'll know that Daddy and I are in a triad again. Her name is kitten but you'll see me refer to as "sis" or "sissy" in the future. So without further ado, let me tell you how it happened.

A bit of back story first, when I first met Daddy, He was with another girl (kitten) but explained to me that He is polyamorous. I told Him that although I had never heard of such a thing or understood how it worked, I told Him that I loved Him and was willing to give it a try. I didn't meet kitten until a few months after I started dating Daddy, so at first it was really easy. I didn't really hear about her so I felt like I was the only one. When we met, we instantly got along but that's when we started feeling insecure about each other. We started noticing our flaws and the perks about the other; "No wonder he fell for her. They have so much in common." At first her and I started out as friends but we ended up crushing on each other and eventually dating too. While it wasn't forced that we become partners, it was nice to love two people and be loved by each other. About a year later things fell apart due to some private issues and kitten going on a high dose of anti-depressants.

Daddy and I never really got over the break up. W/we accepted that she could no longer feel love for us but every once in a while W/we would talk about how W/we missed her. I think part of both of U/us remained hopeful about her return. I think I began to drive Daddy nuts when it came to how often I'd cry a bit or whine about her being gone. I had half a mind back in October to message her on Fetlife and talk it out with her but I was afraid of rejection. Actually I think I did send her a message but it was more of a, "Hey, how are you?" kind of message.

On Halloween I logged in to see this:
[10/31/2013 3:10:04 PM] Daddy: So, I have some news for you. I think you'll be happy to hear it.
[10/31/2013 3:10:30 PM] doll: Oh?
[10/31/2013 3:12:15 PM] Daddy: Yeah. Earlier, while you were asleep, I was talking with kitten. The conversation took a nostalgic, then sentimental turn, and in the end, the possibility of her returning to us came up... and she basically said yes.
I was really happy to read this and I was told to welcome her back into the pack but I was a step ahead of him.

This is kitten, she is Daddy's gorgeous pet and my sister-sub. She is the oldest of the three of us; four years older than me and two years older than Daddy. She lives in the UK so we're all long distance (her and Daddy are only an hhour apart so I envy that) but have plans to live together in the future. We've even looked at dream houses online together and it's a lot of fun. Her move will be a little tougher since she has a young daughter and wants to raise her around her family, but we'll make things work one way or another; Daddy has mentioned that we can see during vacations until she can move. She is the realist of us since she's had experience living with a partner, but she's not pessimistic about things. For me she's just like a big sister who gives me advice and helps me stay on the ground. She's such a sweet heart.

We have dates together just like her and Daddy have dates. Ours tend to be movie dates or voice calls over Skype, nothing sexual yet because we're still working our way there... But we've both mentioned to Daddy and each other what we want to do. There are also days where the three of us hang out on Oovoo together and have a big date and it's a lot of fun.

We do still have our issues though but we're all working on it. We're both having to readjust to life as a poly relationship again. We feel jealousy, envy, and insecurity around each other but this time we've agreed to talk it out rather then letting is fester and consume us. I'm most vocal about it but we both feel it. It's going to take us a while to fully adjust and remind ourselves that Daddy loves us both equally but I know it'll happen. Our job is to make everyone happy and make this work better than the last time. We know what went wrong before and we all really want this to work out long term.

With kitten back I feel like we're complete again. That's not to say that I wasn't happy with Daddy while she was gone, because I was and He was happy too... It was just that I had been longing for a girlfriend again. I had gone through a couple play partners (well one was a girlfriend actually) but it wasn't the same as having her a part of our relationship. Part of me still feels that I'm being unfaithful if I have a partner on the side, even if I have permission from Daddy. So this makes me feel better about wanting to play with another girl and falling in love again. There's something about being loved by two people, it makes you feel extra special. In my case, since kitten is my big sister, I feel like I have that role fulfilled and have another best friend.

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