Friday, December 5, 2014

A Year Later: Thoughts on CG/l instead of DD/lg

In the past year there's been a split between the DD/lg community. If you remember my immature post from last year venting about the name change, it has really caught on since then and a lot of newbies think that this is the correct and official term for the dynamic. However DD/lg has been around for a very long time and up until Tumblr's social justice community got a hold of it, there were no real issues with the name.

The most common reason I've seen for changing the name of the dynamic is to be more inclusive. While I do agree that to new comers, the name does sound restrictive but you would think that it's common sense that it includes everyone of every race, gender, and sexuality. Like I mentioned before, this dynamic is older than just the few years that it's existed on Tumblr. If you browse on Fetlife there are plenty of older Mommy Dommes and Daddy Doms as well as little boys and trans littles. Most of these folks (older adults) have never had a problem with it because it's common knowledge that the lifestyle includes everyone. Many members also oppose the name change because they feel it's pointless for the reason above. I feel like the only ones who seem to have a problem with DD/lg and commonly call people out for calling the dynamic that are people who expect the world to bend over backwards for them.

Unlike last year, I really don't have an issue with people calling the dynamic CG/l. I've gotten a lot of shit (and so have others) for wanting to stick to calling it DD/lg. The only issue I have with CG/l vs DD/lg is that the two are almost two different things now, but with the the similarity that the partner is more of a parental figure. It creates a lot of confusion meshing our dynamic (a D/s one) with lifestyle ageplay (a fetish), even though ageplay can exist without DD/lg and vice versa. And as a result of this there's a lot of misinformation spread that can harm littles and even Doms/Dommes. It creates room for false accusations of abuse due to a CG/l sub meeting a DD/lg Dom/Domme who is expecting a power exchange of some sort. A lot of people who identify as CG/l seem to be more into kinky sex, ageplay, and cute names but no D/s dynamic or power exchange, which is an important part of DD/lg. And there's really nothing wrong with that but for those individuals to bitch and preach at older members of the community about what DD/lg or CG/l really is are silly. Whether these individuals like it or not, DD/lg has been and still is a D/s dynamic.

My stand on it now though is if you feel more comfortable calling yourself CG/l, go for it. If you feel comfortable calling your dynamic DD/lg, go for it. If you want to call your dynamic something else more fitting then go right ahead. The bottom line is don't expect everyone to hop on your bandwagon just because you personally feel excluded, because that's no one else's problem but your own. No one should be shamed for calling the dynamic DD/lg if they want to.

1 comment:

  1. to me dd/lg is really more about sexual gratification through control & punishment. Weather or not "dd" is setting rules in concern for his "lg" punishment & reward are sex. where as cg/l is more about loving the the mind & heart of their "little". Punishment & reward are two different things and neither involve sex. Instead physical intimacy is just that, intimate.