Monday, March 10, 2014

The Difference Between DD/lg and Ageplay

Edit: Feb 24, 2016 - This page has been rewritten with better information, please click here.

As Tumblr has made DD/lg more well-known and popular, I feel there are many newbies who coming in with the wrong idea of the DD/lg dynamic. I've noticed that a lot of newbies think that DD/lg is simply calling someone Daddy/Mommy and having age regression interests such as sippy cups, coloring books, pacifiers, etc. A lot of them have no idea that what they're interested in is ageplay and not the DD/lg dynamic but if you try to correct them, they'll snap at you with some response about kink-shaming and political correctness.

What is the DD/lg dynamic?
I won't go too in depth in this because I've already covered it in this post. The DD/lg dynamic is a part of the D/s (Dominance/submission) dynamic and is a blanket term for anyone who follows the dynamic and identifies as a Daddy. It is a lifestyle. Mommy, little girl, little boy, babygirl, babyboy, etc. This means that there is a Dominant figure and a submissive and there is a power exchange between the two.  The power exchange does not have to be a TPE (total power exchange), it varies between couples - some littles like their Dom to have a lot of control over them while others prefer to only have their Daddy/Mommy control certain aspects of their life. In DD/lg, you'll notice that the Dominant is the Daddy or Mommy and the little is the submissive but sometimes you'll see littles in a Dominant position because they're a switch.

What is ageplay?
Ageplay is a fetish that involves some amount of roleplaying, it's very similar to pet play in the sense that you're acting out specific roles. This means that a person has an interest in regressing or roleplaying a younger age and this can be achieved through dressing up or taking part in younger hobbies and interests. Ageplay divides into three parts: adult baby, little, and middle. AB/DL (adult baby/diaper lover) is a type of ageplay but sometimes tends to be more of a lifestyle for some people. The age range tends to cover baby to toddler age. The "little" division tends to refer to ages 4-10, give or take. Middle refers to the preteen and teenage years, some people do refer to the teenage years as being "big".

Why the confusion?
As you noticed above, a lot of ageplayers refer to themselves as littles or babygirls/babyboys, just as little submissives do.They are two separate kinks though; not all ageplayers are interested in a D/s dynamic and not all little submissives are interested ageplaying. You'll even notice that there are some DD/lg groups on Fetlife that are for age regressing littles and non-ageplaying littles.

You'll notice a lot of people get defensive about terminology and their relationship. "Each relationship is different, based on the needs and desires of the people involved in them." While this is true, there are also titles and groups for a reason - for like-minded people to connect with each other. You are not a DD/lg dynamic if there is no power exchange between you and your partner because of what I explained above. It's okay to be an ageplayer and not have an interest in a power exchange relationship, it's honestly not for everyone. But to tell people that a D/s dynamic is not required to identify as a DD/lg is misinformation and it also puts members from either side in risk of being abused or mislabled as abusive.

Saturday, March 8, 2014

New Toys!

Hi guys!
This is a bit of a late post but I misplaced my camera for a while and found it recently. Last month I went to the dungeon with Chessie and their friends. It was my first real time going because when I went last May, I was only able to stay for a bit. I had gone to a munch earlier that day and most of the people that were there were going to the dungeon that night so I was really looking forward to socializing.

There was a gorgeous vendor's table of handmade leather and suede items. The collars and harnesses caught my attention first but there was one in particular that I really liked: the nipple clamps collar. It's a snap-on collar so it's perfect for scenes and easy to get on and get off. W/we like to call it my slave collar because it reminds U/us of what a slave would wear.
The clamps are clover clamps and they're not to be underestimated; these guys are not adjustable so I recommend clothes pins or adjustable clamps before clover clamps. When I first put them on I couldn't handle them for too long, it was more than what I was used to but I started using it almost daily and got used to the sweet pain. Taking them off now hurts more than putting them on due to blood rushing back in that sensitive area. It's not enough to make me cry but enough for me to gasp and bite my lip. They're also fairly heavy so it adds a nice bit of weight while wearing them and if you want to have more fun, I suggest bending over and let gravity do its job.
I also ended up looking at a set of purple suede cuffs and a posture collar. I've never been into posture collars too much but these were gorgeous and when I tried it on and looked in a mirror, it suited me really well. I decided I'd get those another time though since the pros of nipple clamps outweighted the others'.

About a half hour before we left, I went back to the vendor's table and was eyeing the floggers. I really wanted to buy one and the price was fair to me. Chessie convinced me (they're my enabler) so I started to ask the seller about them, since there were two that I liked. She told me the differences and showed me the differences by testing them on my back. I really liked both but for the price, I couldn't turn down the bigger flogger.
The handle is a 6.5 inches (16.5 cm) rod of wood wrapped in green and black leather. The tails are 17.5 inches (44.5 cm) long and are made of black suede that feels really nice to the touch. As I was looking at this one, some other Doms and Tops were telling me that the quality of this was really nice and I have to agree even though I'm not too knowledgeable in what makes a good flogger. 
When smacked it has a very nice sound that's slightly intimidating but it's sounds more painful than it really is. I haven't been able to really test it yet, it's too long to smack myself with and I'm waiting for Daddy to come visit this summer so we can use it but do expect a review and experience post on it!

Both of these items were made by Second Skin Sin. They make harnesses, collars, posture collars, floggers of different sizes, and and sets of cuffs/restraints. If I'm remembering correctly they do custom colors and sizes, all you have to do is message them on Facebook.